


My Mind Is A Wreck

by dreamingunderthetstars



Series: Snowflakes and Hiccups [1]
Category: How to Train Your Dragon (Movies), rise of the guardians
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, F/F, F/M, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, I'm horribly sorry for this ending but it just happened, Language, M/M, Nerd!Jack, Past Character Death, Punk!Hiccup, Reverse PNAU, Suicide Attempt, Toothless and other dragons are humans, Triggers, there's a whole bunch of characters from other movies on here lol
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-29
Updated: 2015-03-29
Packaged: 2018-03-20 03:23:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,162
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3634824
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dreamingunderthetstars/pseuds/dreamingunderthetstars
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The first time Jack really sees Hiccup, the boy is nursing bloody knuckles and a bruised cheek. The second time is when Jack lands in Hiccup’s lap.</p>
            </blockquote>





	My Mind Is A Wreck

**Author's Note:**

> I suppose this could be pre Hijack, in a way. I just really love the whole punk-nerd AU. I hope you like it! I apologize for any mistakes I might have missed.

The first time Jack really sees Hiccup, the boy is nursing bloody knuckles and a bruised cheek. His eyes are closed as he leans back against the plastic chair. Mrs. Dare, the schools’ nurse, hands the junior a bag of ice to hold over his knuckles and face. Hiccup has dark brunet hair, emerald eyes, freckles, and a tattoo spiraling up his arms, along with a couple of piercings that Jack wouldn’t dare to even contemplate about. Everyone knows about Hiccup Haddock—the seventeen-year-old has a reputation of being a badass who wouldn’t take shit from anyone, and is known for solving arguments with his fists.

“Honestly, Mr. Haddock,” Mrs. Dare scolds. “Must I see you every month?”

Hiccup smirks a little. “But you enjoy my company, Sarah.”

Mrs. Dare flushes and gives Hiccup a scalding glare. “Don’t make me give you detention for disrespect, Mr. Haddock— _again_.”

Hiccup chuckles underneath his breath but doesn’t respond. Mrs. Dare soon bustles towards her small office. Jack sees a small flicker of pain, hurt, and something else go over Hiccup’s face but it’s gone as soon as it emerged, and Jack ponders on if he imagined it instead.

The second time is when Jack is running away from Matthew “Snotlout” Jorgenson, Terrance “Tuffnut” Thorston, and Damien “Dagur the Deranged” Berserker. School had ended thirty minutes ago but Jack was held back by his English teacher. It was just his luck that he had to bump into the destructive, bullying trio on his way to his locker. They decided that chasing him with threats of bodily harm was much more imperative than going to football practice.

Hiccup is hanging out with his friends, Astrid Hofferson, Fishlegs Ingerman, Camicazi Neumann, Jamie and Sophie Bennett, and the twins Caleb and Claude. There were more people in Hiccup’s army of friends but those were the ones surrounding him. They were all hanging around the old oak tree in the courtyard, sitting, sprawled out on the cookie cutter perfect grass. Jack pays them no mind since he’s currently running for his life and going through excuses in his mind to pick which one to tell his guardians why he was coming home (“ _again_ , Jack?!”) bruised and bloodied, and Jack didn’t think the old excuse of rugby tryouts were going to cut it.

“FROST!” came Snotlout’s familiar roar and Jack begins to panic, knowing that he won’t be able to get away now because _he wasn’t fast_ , which makes him trip on his feet…

…and land on Hiccup’s lap.                                                                                                     

Hiccup smirks. “Well, hello there.”

Jack can tell his face is turning all the shades of red known to mankind as he stammers out apologizes and struggles to get off of the boy who was capable of breaking all the bones in his body but the trio is there and Jack freezes.

“Oh, Hiccup…hey…” says Tuffnut, who gulps at the sight of Hiccup.

It was well known that Tuffnut was terrified of Hiccup. Jack doesn’t know the entire story but right now Hiccup is the only barrier between certain death and freedom. He hasn’t been beaten up in over a month and his family are in high spirits over the bullying to be done with. Jack didn’t have the heart to tell them that he had just gotten better at hiding and evading their fists.

“Tuffnut,” Hiccup greets. “Snotlout. Dagur. Aren’t you supposed to be at practice?”

“Aren’t you?” sneers Dagur.

That’s right, Jack thinks to himself. Hiccup is captain of the baseball and soccer teams at the school.

“Practice was canceled today,” Hiccup speaks.

Jack is getting uncomfortable because he’s sitting on a boys’ lap whilst said boy talks to his bullies as if nothing is wrong with the world, and he has to get home before Emma or else there will be questions and prying eyes, and did he mention that he was on someone’s lap?

“Why don’t you boys go take a hike?” Camicazi speaks from where she’s perched. She’s also sitting on someone’s lap—Sophie’s—and inspecting her nails, looking bored. “Or, better yet, leave and never come back?”

Snotlout narrows his eyes and his fists clench. Instinctively, Jack tenses in Hiccup’s protective embrace. Hiccup notices and absentmindedly rubs Jacks’ back to calm him down.

“Listen, you ditzy whore—,”

It’s Jamie Bennett who gets up next. He’s a blur to Jack’s eyes and grabs the front of Snotlout’s shirt. Jamie is taller than Snotlout by a foot and currently wore gloves with spikes on them. “What did you just call my cousin?” the boy growls.

Snotlout actually pales.

Jack flinches when he hears the tell-tale sound of someone getting clobbered and shudders. He hates violence and bruises. It isn’t long before a fight breaks out. Camicazi enters the fight to defend her womanly honor and soon the twins join the foray, and it’s a mess of punching fists and elbows and teeth and snarls before Hiccup sighs and says, “Stop playing with them – don’t want to get suspended again, do we?”

Just like that, Hiccup’s friends back off after leaving a few more hits and soon the trio scrambles away to lick their wounds and pride.

Astrid looks over at Jack and says warmly, “You alright kid?”

Jack just barely remembers nodding before he begins to struggle once more to escape from Hiccup’s (very, very strong and muscled) arms. “Easy there,” Hiccup says softly. His friends share knowing looks and smirks that Hiccup rolls his eyes at and Jack has no clue to what they even mean.

“I-I need t-to—,”

“Need to calm the fuck down,” comments Caleb – or was it Claude?

“Go _home_.” Jack gasps as anxiety flutters throughout his ribcage like a captured bird. “I need to go home, _now_. Let me go!”

Fuck. He can’t have a panic attack now. He needed to go home before the oncoming attack escalated. He didn’t want to have an attack around people who were notorious and violent and indifferent and-and-and

“He’s having a fucking panic attack. Shit.” Sophie exclaims. “Someone calm him down! Hiccup!”

“Stop yelling at me!” responds Hiccup. Hiccup starts rubbing Jack’s back methodically. It’s soothing but Jack can’t think of anything else except for the panic and terror that curls in the pit of his stomach and around his neck, as if hands were choking him, and he can only focus on the pounding of his heart as if he were running a 12K Marathon in only two hours. Hiccup’s mouth is suddenly near his ear and he says, “Breathe, Jack. _Breathe_.”

Jack breathes, following Hiccup’s breathing pattern with ease. He’s done this before. It isn’t the first time Jack copied someone else’s breathing pattern to calm himself down. However, his breath still hitches and is choppy, and the panic is still there. Waiting.

“Talk to him,” came the soft voice of Fishlegs. His real name is William but ever since preschool, and a story that dealt with the class pet fish, everyone has called him Fishlegs. “Sometimes if the ‘follow my breathing’ technique doesn’t work than it’s a good idea to speak to the person experiencing the panic attack, it makes them think of something other than the fact that they’re currently having an attack.”

“Got it. Thanks, ‘Legs,” Hiccup says. “Alright, Jack, was it? I’m Hiccup although you most likely knew that. According to my little brother, I’m notorious.” His friends laugh and joke at that. “Anyway…what am I supposed to say? I don’t even know the kid! I mean, yeah, I’ve seen him around before but he always sits up front in class, doesn’t socialize — fuck, do you even eat lunch? Like, damn.”

“It’s like he’s depressed or something,” Sophie quips from where she sits.

Jack groaned into Hiccup’s shirt and says, “I am not depressed.”

“I think you’re in denial,” Astrid says. Is that a look of concern on her features?

The panic recedes and Jack can finally breathe again. This time, when he tries to get up from Hiccup’s grip, he’s able to maneuver himself safely and he stumbles to his feet. “Th-thanks for that,” Jack stammers as he grabs his bag. “B-but…I need to go.”

Before any of them could respond, Jack is already gone.

* * *

The next day Jack trudges to his locker, exhausted from a fitful night. He notices Astrid leaning against some lockers a few feet away, talking to Sophie and Camicazi and some girl Jack knew to be Mavis. He opens his locker and puts his history, English, and physics textbooks inside and grabbing his Calculus book for first period. He shuts his locker and makes his way to class, ignoring the girls’ eyes on his retreating figure. He slouches in his seat in Calculus, thankful for the first time that his seat is all the way in the back of the classroom.

“Morning, Jack,” greets one of Jack’s somewhat friends. His name Alexander but he likes to be called Toothless. Jack doesn’t ask for the story and Toothless never tells him. They are both nerds and geeks and freaks in the sea of vicious, bloodthirsty teenagers.

Ms. Potts begins the lesson. Jack half-heartedly pays attention though he can feel himself submersing into slumber.

“You should come over,” says Toothless. “Or, at least, have lunch with me, Stormfly, and Hookfang.”

“Where’s Meatlug?”

“She’s sick, again,” Toothless sighs. “I swear, that girl’s immune system is nonexistent.”

Jack chuckles because he knows it’s true. Meatlug – it was actually Hannah – was almost constantly sick and if she wasn’t, then she was sniffling or sneezing.

Jack sighs and says, “Why not. It isn’t like I have someone waiting for me.”

Jack mostly spends lunch hiding from his bullies or in the library, finishing his homework. Spending time with his somewhat friends and fellow nerds doesn’t sound so bad.

Toothless grins. “Awesome.”

Calculus ends with Ms. Potts yelling their homework assignment and once it is scribbled down, Jack hightails it to his next class: art. Jack has this class with Hiccup, Jamie, and one of their friends’ whose name was Torch. They sit in the back of the classroom while Jack normally sits in the front or the middle. Their teacher – Miss Bell – doesn’t like assigned seats and loves organized chaos. Miss Bell is mute and does attendance by writing their names on the board, where when she would point to it with her ruler, said student would have to say here or raise their hand and Miss Bell would erase their name.

Once attendance is over with, Miss Bell turns on the projector where a PowerPoint Presentation appeared explaining their assignment.

_“I want you to sketch out something that explains how you feel on the inside. Don’t sugarcoat anything. I want to know how you feel. There isn’t any precise way to do this assignment – do what you think is right for you. Most importantly, have fun.”_

Jack blinks and looks down at the blank page on his sketchbook. He was feeling many things. Confusion. Anger. Disappointment. Disgusted. Sad. Resigned. He’s about to begin when three desks are surrounding his own.

“Aw,” one of them says. “Sophie was right—you’re like a little snowflake.”

Jack blinks as he looks up. It was Torch who said it. “Uh…”

“Those idiots bugging you still?” asked Jamie as he took out a colored pencil. “I wouldn’t mind hitting Snotty again – it made me feel wonderful.”

Jack blinks again—he isn’t sure what to think or say. Why did they even care? So they saw him being bullied and were able to maneuver his bullies’ attention elsewhere, and they also witnessed an embarrassing panic attack but that was it.

 _They probably feel sorry for me_ , he thinks to himself. They’re looking at him expectedly, especially Hiccup, and he clears his throat to respond. “Well, I haven’t seen them around today so no. They’re most likely lurking about, waiting for when I’m alone.”

Jack then ducks his head and starts the outline of his sketch. He doesn’t know what he’s going to draw so he’s just going to let his fingers move, allow his mind to take over and create the masterpiece. “I don’t get the assignment,” groaned Jamie. “I don’t know how I feel.”

“Poor baby,” teased Hiccup.

Jack ignored the trio in favor of focusing on whatever is was that he was feeling and soon found himself submerging in his sketch, disregarding the world of reality in favor for one of art and imagination. Faintly, he hears Torch and Jamie arguing over what to draw while Hiccup draws and calls them a bunch of lackluster idiots. Torch calls Hiccup a jackass. Jamie calls Torch a dumbass which makes Torch say they were going to settle this outside during lunch. Jamie agrees, says he’s going to wipe the floors with his blood.

Jack tries his best to smother his flinches.

“Ooh, Jack, that’s so beautiful!” cries a girl from behind him.

Jack comes out of his drawing haze and blinks owlishly at another one of his somewhat friend, Rapunzel. Her name is really Rebecca but because of her long blonde hair, love for painting, and a pet chameleon she named Pascal, Jack once joked that she was Rapunzel reincarnated. The nickname stuck. Jack then observes what he drew. There’s a moon peeking out from clouds covering the sky, shining down on the forest and lake he’d drawn. Around the edges of the lake, there’s black tendrils and smoke drifting from the forestry and foliage. It signifies danger or a certain instability. Snow covers the ground and the trees, and they lightly fall from the sky. On one side of the lake, near the edge, there’s the outline of a little girl kneeling. Jack can’t tell if he drew her sad or not but then his gaze drifts towards the center of the lake where spider-web like cracks are on the iced over lake.

There’s a hole in the middle of the lake and a staff on top of the lake next to the hole. It’s the perfect size as if someone had fallen in. A couple of inches away from the hole, there’s a pair of skates. Jack looks away, refusing to cry and show how shaken he feels by that simple sketch. Hiccup stares at him, a knowing look in his forest green eyes.

“That’s some deep stuff, snowflake,” Torch commented.

Rebecca raises an eyebrow. “Snowflake?”

“Shut up, Punzie,” scowls Jack before he glares at Torch. “Don’t call me snowflake.”

“Aw, but it’s adorable,” Rebecca says.

Jack rolls his eyes. “You think everything is adorable.”

“Do not!”

The bell rings and Jack packs up, already out of the classroom despite Hiccup’s and his friends’ attempts to speak to him. It’s only one more period before lunch. He just has to suffer through Orchestra for fifty minutes. A boy Jack doesn’t really speak to but they have a mutual understanding that they’re both loners and nerds and victims of bullying sits down next to him with the rest of the violinists. First chair is a really sweet girl named Alice. Jack’s second chair and the boy – Monty, whose Camicazi’s little brother – sits in third chair. Alice is ostracized as well and gets harassed by the girls on the Cheerleading team.

They call her Alice the Unbalanced amongst other things.

Monty calls them whores and sluts who should be in a brothel.

When the bell for lunch rings, Alice stays for practice while Monty and Jack grab their things before going their separate ways. Monty has practice with the chess team and Jack is going to go into the cafeteria for the first time since freshman year when Snotlout’s girlfriend, Heather, poured her milkshake down his head and threw her macaroni and cheese in his face, telling him that he wasn’t wanted and would never be wanted.

As Jack walks through the threshold, peering around for Toothless or any familiar faces, he tries his best not to look like a nervous, terrified wreck.

A minute passes and people are starting to look at Jack weirdly. A girl with wild red hair passes him by and whispers to her friend, “wee lamb looks terrified…think he’s new?”

“Most likely,” the friend responds. The girls send him looks of pity but don’t offer help.

Jack wants to scream. He’s going to leave. It wasn’t worth it. He’ll just tell Toothless that he felt sick or that Snotlout caught him or—

A hand lands on his shoulder and Hookfang greets him. “Hey Jack! So glad you’re finally eating lunch with us. Come on, we’re over here.” As if understanding how much anxiety is building up in the pit of Jack’s stomach, Hookfang (his real name is Peter) guides Jack to their table in the back. Toothless is already situated and he’s talking animatedly with Rebecca. Toothless carries a square, metal lunchbox with stickers plastered all over it.

“—and I’m telling _you_ that PVRIS is _so_ much better than—,”

“You are erroneous!” Toothless barks passionately. “Don’t you dare diss my—,”

“Oh my god,” Hookfang moans once he plops down next to Toothless, snatching one of the boys’ carrot sticks effortlessly. “I thought we trashed this argument in AP, guys. It’s like an hour old already. Find something new to argue about, please.”

Toothless gives him a death glare and a pout while Rebecca spots Jack and squeals, “Snowflake! You’ve actually agreed to lunch!”

Jack gives her a flat look. “Stop calling me Snowflake, Rapunzel!”

She snorts out a laugh. “Nope. That nickname is going to stick.”

Jack rolls his eyes and Hookfang looks at him bewildered. “You’re Snowflake, Jack!?”

Jack blinks, Rebecca nods as she takes a bite out of her apple, and Toothless chokes a little on his spaghetti.

“What’s the big deal about someone calling me snowflake?” asks Jack but before they could answer him, people begin to crowd the table. They plop down with their lunch trays and laughter. Jack is squished between Astrid and Camicazi. Stormfly (her real name is Samantha) sits down next to Hookfang, and Hiccup squeezes in between Toothless and Rebecca. Jack’s beginning to think that maybe he should’ve stayed in the orchestra room.

“Hey little brother,” Hiccup greets Toothless, who gives him a soft hi, shy now that his brother is here.

“Snowflake!” cries the twins, Caleb and Claude from where they sat.

Jack somehow squeaks out a hello. Everyone except for his somewhat friends burst into laughter. Jack’s cheeks burn. Stormfly gives him a comforting smile. “See,” Sophie says. “I told you he’s an adorable snowflake.”

Jack doesn’t know if he should feel pleased or mortified.

Lunch passes in a flurry of laughter, threats, and a bloodied and smug Jamie who returns after his “business” with Torch, who didn’t come to lunch at all. Jack meets everyone else in Hiccup’s crowd—a boy named Skullcrusher, twins named Barf and Belch, a senior named Cupcake, and a girl named Pippa. The rest of the day is a blur but Jack still isn’t surprised when he’s cornered after school again by Snotlout and a football player aptly named Dogsbreath (the Duhbrain). After thirty minutes of blinding pain, Jack somehow manages to pick himself off the ground and try to walk home. However, he crumbles on the sidewalk and groans, wondering how he would be able to explain this but a minute later, he’s being picked up from behind.

Bridal style.

“Um…” he stammers, cheeks red, and he looks up to see that it’s Hiccup carrying him.

“You’re ruining my rep, snowflake,” Hiccup says but it isn’t with malice. “Now – where’s your house?”

Shocked, Jack gives Hiccup his address and they make it there in no time. Jack groans in distress once he sees the two cars in the driveway and Emma’s bike lying on the grass. _I’m finished now_ , Jack thinks dejectedly. _There is no way I’ll be able to hide this._

As Hiccup makes his way up the front porch steps, the door is flung open by a preteen girl. “Jack, you’re ho—,” Emma starts before she sees Hiccup and Jack’s broken form being held. Her face is clouded with fear. “Jack!”

Pounding footsteps are heard a split second after Emma yells. Soon a towering male emerges from behind Emma, taking in the scene. This man has tattoos on his arms, a white beard and hair, and icy blue eyes just like Jack’s. “Jack,” the man says. “What happened?” he looks at Hiccup. “Thank you for bringing him home.”

“No problem, sir,” Hiccup says smoothly.

Hiccup hands Jack over to his guardian before giving a wave goodbye and stepping out into the afternoon sun, and Jack is left to deal with a frantic woman coddling over him and a somber man bandaging his bruises and cuts all while Emma looks on with a tearful expression.

The next day, Jamie and Pippa are waiting at his locker, conversing. Jack doesn’t ask why they’re there and they don’t tell him why. They walk him to his first period and Toothless walks him to his second period, where he’s surrounded by Hiccup, Torch, Jamie, and Rebecca. And during sixth period, Jack crosses Snotlouts’ and Dogsbreaths’ paths in the bathroom. They leave him be and when Jack finds Hiccup leaning against his locker at the end of the day, Jack doesn’t mention the two football players’ black eyes and bruises to Hiccup. Hiccup doesn’t say a thing either.

It’s a wonderful feeling and Jack wonders on if this is what it feels like to have friends who love him.

* * *

It’s December 9th and the gang finds Jack sitting in a cove, where there’s a lake. Jamie and Sophie have a greyhound named Abby, who easily found Jack within an hour. They gather around him, not knowing why he looks so depressed and doesn’t speak. Jack’s wearing a hoodie with the hood pulled up and silent tears run down his face. Toothless and Rebecca lean on his shoulders, giving him comfort without words. Because they understand what today is. They understand.

And understanding is just what Jack needs right now.

Later when everyone breaks off from their tight circle to explore, Hiccup plops down next to Jack. He doesn’t ask or speak. Jack loves him for that.

“Her name was Penelope,” Jack started. “She was – she was only nine. I-I was thirteen. This was back when I lived with my mom, when my dad didn’t get sick, when…I was happy. It was today by this exact lake. I told her not to go too far because I wasn’t sure the ice was all that stable. She was nine and excited so…she didn’t really listen to my words.” Jack’s voice was getting thick with sobs that wracked his body. Everyone was silent as they listened. They could already see where this story was heading. “Next thing I knew, the ice was cracking right underneath her little feet. She was so terrified and I had a little staff with me, which had a little crook on it. It should’ve been perfect to grab here away from there. I tried to make it into a little game, so that she wouldn’t be so scared.”

_“Jack, I’m scared.”_

_“It’s going to be okay. You’re going to be fine. We’re going to have a little fun instead!”_

_“You have to believe in me.”_

_“Would I trick you?”_

_“You always play tricks, Jack!”_

_“Let’s play hopscotch…”_

_“P-PENELOPE!!”_

“…I was too late, though, and she fell through.” Jack finishes before he breaks down into sobs.

_“It’s your fault my daughter is dead!”_

_“It should’ve been you, Jack. IT SHOULD’VE BEEN YOU!!”_

_“You murdered your own sister. How can you live with yourself?”_

Hiccup wraps his arms around Jack, whose mind and thoughts are on nothing except Penelope and ice and death, and the high pitch of her scream as the ice breaks and she tumbles through. Gone. Forever.

_“IT SHOULD’VE BEEN YOU!!”_

* * *

 It’s March 19th, the first day of Spring Break, and Toothless gets a call at four in the morning. He had passed out playing Kingdom Hearts II and consuming junk food and soda around two. He manages to break out of his junk food coma to answer his cell. Through clouded eyes, he sees that it’s Rebecca.

“Punzie?” he answers. “It’s four in the morning. What’s wrong?”

Because Toothless knows that Rebecca would never call someone at this time of day unless something was seriously wrong. Rebecca’s sobbing over the phone, choking out her words, and in the background Toothless can hear Stormfly screaming and Hookfang trying to calm her down. Toothless hears beeps and voices rising up and down. He sits up immediately, already pulling on his jacket and shoes. If Hiccup won’t wake up, he’ll fucking run if he has to. However, there’s only two words Toothless can make out of Rebecca’s cries—Jack and Hospital. Toothless ends the call with, “I’ll be right there. Hang on.” And barges into his older brothers’ room, not giving a damn about how the noise and his hollering will wake up the rest of the family.

“What — the — ever — living — _fuck_ , Toothless?!” growls Hiccup.      

“What is going on, boys?” asks their mother – Valka Haddock – who’s in the process of tying her robe as she walks towards them. Their father walks out with a baseball bat, thinking there’s an intruder. When it’s just his two sons, he gives them stern glares and a “boys.”

“Don’t look at me,” Hiccup says. “Look at him! He just barged in here – Toothless? Are you…are you _crying_?”

Yes, yes he was. Toothless doesn’t remember the last time he cried but he knows it has something to do with when he was younger and was abandoned in a forest but that’s a story for another day, another time, because something was wrong with Jack.

“We need to go to the hospital,” is all Toothless says and explains. “ _Now._ I will walk if I have to.”

He doesn’t walk.

Burgess only has one hospital and they reach it in only ten minutes, since there were only ghosts on the road at four. Toothless waits for no one as he charges out of the car and inside the lobby, still crying with snot bubbles and everything. The whole nine yards. Blubbering, he asks for Jack and gets told that he’s currently in ICU but there’s a lobby on floor five where he’s allowed to wait for news. Once again, he tears down the hallway towards the elevators with his family just walking through the front doors of the hospital. They trample after him, calling his name with fear tinting their voices. The elevator closes before they reach him and he hurriedly touches the button for floor five and taps his feet impatiently, biting his fingernails.

Once he’s on floor five, he rushes to ask for the waiting room, where he’s directed with a couple of tissues, a sympathetic smile, and a pat on the back. From the corner of his eye, Toothless sees his family enter the floor from another elevator. They’ve almost reached him when Stormfly launches herself in his arms, sobbing hysterically as well, and he soon finds himself surrounded by a crying Rebecca, a silent and grave Meatlug, and a teary-eyed Hookfang. He sees Monty and a girl he distantly knows as Alice hanging in the back, comforting each other.

“L-let’s go sit down,” his mother suggests to the sobbing group gently. They move together with trembling knees and limbs. Toothless collapses in chair.

He gulps in a breath. “What the _hell_ happened?”

“H-He called me a-around t-two,” Rebecca explains through her tears. “I…he was saying goodbye. I thought it was b-because h-he was l-leaving for spring break b-but no…it wasn’t. N-Next thing I know, I’m on his front porch. His sister, Emma, let me in without even asking why I was there. I was told he was in his room. B-B-But…oh god…there’s was so much blood – _so much blood_. I don’t remember much after than except for screaming and a call to 911.”

“Why would he…” Toothless starts, swallowing. “What was going on in his head?”

“Who knows,” droned Meatlug. “Maybe he was always this way and just snapped.”

“Stop talking about him as if he’s dead, Hannah!” shouts Stormfly. “Because he _is not_.”

Meatlug doesn’t speak much after that.

“What’s going on?” asks Stoick, Toothless’ father. “Who is in ICU?”

“Snowflake,” cries Rebecca.

Hiccup makes a choking sound in the back of his throat.

Valka questions, “Who?”

“His name is Jack,” explains Alice. “But his nickname is Snowflake….and he…” Alice starts crying softly. Monty holds her as he continues her explanation.

“He just tried to commit suicide.”

* * *

Jack wakes up around the twenty first of March in a white room. He doesn’t remember much except pain and his thoughts and the sound of Rebecca’s screaming as he blacked out. He looks around and sees that it’s only Hiccup in the room. He’s watching a soccer game on the television. Jack makes no motion to say that he’s awake and he’s breathing and he’s alive and—

He’s still alive.

But Hiccup notices that he’s awake a minute later. Hiccup always seems to notice Jack. Hiccup walks to his bedside and sits down on the chair next to it. “Morning sunshine,” Hiccup greets with half of a smile and half of a grimace.

“You look awful,” Jack croaks out through a parched throat.

Hiccup lets out a soft laugh. “Yeah, I guess I do, huh? Here…drink this.” Hiccup hands Jack a glass of water and Jack greedily gulps it down because it feels so good and cool sliding down his throat. Once the water has been consumed, Hiccup sets the glass down on the small bedside table and stares at Jack. Jack knows what he’s thinking. Why’d he do it? Why was he so messed up in the head? Why try to give up his life when he still had so much to live for?

But Hiccup doesn’t ask those things.

“It’s going to be okay,” he says, staring straight into Jack’s eyes. “It’s going to be okay, Jack.”

Jack gives him a half a smile and half a grimace as well but he’s willing himself not to cry. Hiccup gives him a beaming smile before turning back to the game. Jack looks down, feeling unfamiliar warmth and callousness. Their holding hands. And he does start to cry, softly, because it’s a heartbreaking thing to know that the one you’re in love with has no idea and probably likes girls and most definitely looks at you like a little sibling, someone to protect, something breakable.

So Hiccup watches his game and Jack cries.

And while he may not be able to tell Hiccup that he’s loved him for months, it’ll be okay. Somehow.

Because he loved Hiccup and was already preparing himself for the day when he’d have to let him go.

**Author's Note:**

> To be honest, I wasn't expecting to write this ending. It just happened.  
> C H A R A C T E R S  
> Ms. Potts - the teapot in Beauty & the Beast  
> Ms. Bell - Tinkerbell from Peter Pan  
> Alice - Alice from Alice in Wonderland  
> Dogsbreath - Dogsbreath the Duhbrain in How to Train Your Dragon book series by Cressida Cowell  
> Rebecca - Rapunzel from Tangled  
> Torch - Torch the Typhoomerang from DreamWorks Dragons (forgot which season it was)


End file.
